Saturday, September 25, 2004

Atonal 

The AOL 28.8 interface gets frustrating rather quickly when you're used to the LAN. Dad's screensettings are huge and bright; this chair hurts my relapsed back, especially stiff after a day of fasting sit-down-stand-up with Mom in the Yom Kippur sanctuary. And it seems a bit odd, almost ridiculous, to be writing from the source, the very chair-and-screen, of my most regular readership (hi, Dad!) while he himself fumbles just upstairs -- not a total waste of media formality, given the total spectrum of readership, but it does feel kind of like writing and publishing a book for your roommate's eyes only.

And no one really reads this thing on weekends, I know.

But there's content to be spread, text to be said, that words can be read for posterity, asperity, entertainment, what-have-you. Quickly, then:

For all those offended, regardless of intent or personal gain, I offer my sincere apology. You deserve better; I love you more than I may have said, and I apologize.

Even if you never noticed my lapses, or I never noticed, or we shared the experience without the name; even if I made you happy, and it was not as much as I could have: I could do better by you.

In this time of self-exploration, or recommitment, of sorrow and yearning for betterment, I commit myself to you, and your betterment, and ask that you hold me to it.

May we be blessed enough to be inscribed in the book of life for another year together, side by side. And may we be honored, one day in the long distant future, to see those inscriptions, and smile, and remember each other fondly, and have more fondness to remember than we could ever have pain.

posted by boyhowdy | 9:48 PM |

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