Saturday, November 01, 2003

Halloweenblog: Hello, My Name Is Jesus


Orange goes so well with the site colors, doncha think?


Cobwebs and pumpkin faced goons on every porch, in every corridor; chocolate pudding cakemash with candy corn and gummy worms in it at supper; students dressed as Fat Elvis and Dilbert, pirates and angels, devils and catholic schoolgirls (or I suppose they could have been porn stars in catholic school girl uniforms). As for me, though I decided to start with a tie for a parent meeting this morning, by eleven I was letting the now over-a-foot-long hair down, changing surreptitiously into sandals, and the good old burlap and belt, behind the circulation desk. So help me God, I was Jesus this year again, and if I do say so myself, it was, as always, a huge success.

It feels a bit like cheating to go out into the world as Jesus. I mean, I'm practically the son of God already: I'm Jewish; I've already got the long blond hair, the beard, the blue eyes and the semitic hook of the western conception. I make a goddam awesome Jesus, scarily so. But more, I love to push the Politically Correct button more than most, and isn't Halloween supposed to be liminal, anything-goes, a day of topsy turvy? Kids laugh and tell me I "look good" (we are all good, my child); I got a roomful of laughter when, without thinking, I said "bless you" to some kid who sneezed; the kids on the bus gave me a standing ovation when I gave them a benediction as I passed. So what if a few old fogeys on faculty were a little bit uncomfortable. A decade after God's voice endorsed Hebrew National hot dogs, nothing is sacred save in context. In the realm of the post-postmodern, iconography doesn't mean what it used to, and they'll just have to get over it.

The hardest part is deciding whether or not to go with the stigmata. So far, I haven't had the guts. But the sunglasses were a big hit this year, and made folks less uncomfortable than the crown of thorns did three years ago. I'm thinking next year I might add a machine gun. Y'know, like After 2000 years Jesus is back...but this time he's really pissed. Or maybe just a name tag. If you're gonna run the risk of defiling someone's sacred symbols, you gotta keep it simple.

posted by boyhowdy | 12:27 AM |

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